Five Horrible Arguments for Circumcision

Posted on 10. Jan, 2010 by Bran Rainey in Lists, Rants

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Circumcision is a surgery performed on boys, usually at birth, which removes the foreskin (a hood of skin that normally covers the glans). The decision to circumcise or not is left to the parents; the surgery can be done later in life, but almost never is. Most countries have made up their mind, culturally, whether they do circumcisions or not: they’re the norm in the USA, but not in Britain. Very few people put any real thought into it; it’s just something that’s done as a routine.

The foreskin is not a necessary part of the penis — in the sense that it doesn’t actually affect the man’s reproductive function — but cutting it off is entirely unnecessary. In fact, it goes beyond being unnecessary. Circumcision in this day and age is flat-out stupid. It’s not a big deal, no, but it gets way less controversy than it deserves.

There are five horrible arguments I see people make in support of circumcision: let’s rip them to shreds.

5) “My religion says that men need to be circumcised.”

This is probably the best reason to get your son circumcised, I’ll admit. It’s stupid, but at least it doesn’t pretend to be anything more than a vague excuse. Saying “my religion says so” is the equivalent to plugging your ears and humming, really.

But really, who cares about your religion? It’s always annoyed me how religious people like to pick and choose things to believe. Whenever something makes no sense or gets thoroughly disproven through science, the religious have a tendency to excuse whatever conflicting dogma they have — so it’s an allegory now? Fair enough, but if you’re going to ignore bits of your religion anyway, just ignore the part about circumcision as well.

I’ll be honest: I hate religion. Can’t stand it. Even so, I accept that people have a right to believe what they want. What I don’t accept is using your beliefs to circumcise your son, who might not even have the same beliefs as you. It’s not like you’d know.

4) “The foreskin can cause health problems.”

This is the most infuriating, but it’s low on the list because it’s not as common as it used to be. Still, I do occasionally talk to people who labour under the impression that circumcision is “good for you”. IT ISN’T! And some people just refuse to accept this fact. How hard is it to understand?

Yes, it is technically true that circumcision at birth can prevent certain medical problems such as phimosis. But how common is phimosis? I’ll give you a hint: it’s not! No matter what all the over-diagnoses from paranoid parents and ridiculous old wives’ tales say, the vast majority of men do not have a hard time retracting their foreskin.

That applies to pretty much every medical myth about circumcision. There’s no significant medical benefit to circumcision, and anyone who says otherwise — based on some urban legend — is woefully misinformed.

3) “Circumcised is easier to clean!”

This argument is just baffling to me. Are uncircumcised penises really that hard to clean? According to a lot of people who aren’t uncircumcised men, yes they are. According to everyone else, what the hell are you talking about? That makes no sense. Do you have a hard time cleaning under your arms, too?

There’s no greater way to say “I have no confidence in my son whatsoever” than to get him cut at birth. You don’t even know him yet and you already think he’s a slob! Seriously, it might be uncomfortable if you have to remind your son to wash behind his ~~ears~~ penis, but that won’t even be necessary. He can figure it out on his own, I’m sure.

2) “It feels better for a woman!”

And gay men, presumably, but nobody ever mentions that. All I can say to this is, how the hell do you know? Most countries aren’t split evenly: either a huge number of people are circumcised, or almost no one is. It’s very unlikely for someone to have experience with both cut and uncut penises, in significant enough numbers to actually be able to have a non-bullshit opinion on the matter. And even if you do have the credentials necessary to shout your opinion, it doesn’t even matter. That’s still just your opinion. If there were an obvious winner in the war of “what penises feel better”, it would be common knowledge. Yet people give different answers to the “what feels better” question, usually in direct relation to what is more common in their country.

Beyond your son’s hypothetical future partner, there’s also his sensation to think about. Some people who have had circumcisions later in life say the sensation is worse, and some say that it’s the same. No one says that it’s better, except for the people who have no way of telling. So the option you’re given is thus: have no effect on the sensation whatsoever, rendering the surgery pointless in that regard, or have a negative effect on the sensation, which is a bad thing. Unless you want your son to have less sensation.

I’ve heard the excuse that being less sensitive is a good thing, because then the man can last longer and let his partner have an orgasm first. The people who honestly think this have a) no confidence in their son again, and b) an intimate knowledge of old sitcom cliches. Just shut the hell up already, please. That whole “women are hard to please” shit is getting more annoying by the day.

1) “It looks better circumcised!”

So what, you’re a penis connoisseur? People’s opinions on the aesthetic show the same pattern as above: their preferences depend on what’s most common in their country. So yes, most people in the USA would say they like cut penises better. That could be a valid reason to get your son circumcised: you want him to be accepted by his future lovers, you don’t want him to be ugly, or “different”, or whatever. That’s a good thing for a parent to think about. But you still have to take a risk with it: what if the surgery goes wrong?

It’s not likely in this day and age, but it’s certainly possible. And is it really worth it to take a risk just for the sake of looks? Would you support his expensive plastic surgery, too? Getting it cut just because you think it looks better is a silly reason; a silent way of saying, “Yeah, I don’t really have a reason. I’m just going with the crowd because I’m too lazy to resist.”

Circumcision represents something. Whether your country makes it the norm or not, making your decision based on that fact alone shows that you can’t be bothered thinking for yourself, and you have a disregard for your son, however slight it may be. You should do research and make an educated decision, because myths and misconceptions are rampant when it comes to routine practices like this.

Many circumcised men won’t want to think about it, or they’ll fudge up an answer so they don’t have to think negatively about themselves. But really, it doesn’t matter if you’re circumcised or not. Just because it’s something we should stop, doesn’t mean it’s something we should be ashamed of.

I bet my mother didn’t think I’d ever write 1300 words about penises. Your children can surprise you.

Tags: circumcision, parenting, penis, sex

11 Responses to “Five Horrible Arguments for Circumcision”

Mike

10. Jan, 2010

Excellent. The last line is a killer, too. (Y)
Restoring Tally

10. Jan, 2010

Great rant. There are no valid reasons to cut off the sex organs of a baby boy. I really wish I had not been circumcised at birth. I spent too many years having sex with only part of dick. Fortunately, I found out about foreskin restoration and it is making things a lot better. If men only knew how much better sex is with a full sex organ, infant circumcision would stop immediately.
SaintSkip

11. Jan, 2010

I enjoyed this article a bunch – but I’m already a member of the Intactivist camp. I wonder how many of the “undecided” people will read this without stopping halfway through, labeling you a radical zealot and dismissing your opinions completely.

Preaching to the choir is easy, mate. Changing minds requires etiquette, moderation and tact. Which are you trying to do here?
SaintSkip

11. Jan, 2010

Again, I really really enjoyed this.
Bran Rainey

11. Jan, 2010

I wasn’t trying to change anyone’s mind with this, really, though that would be nice. I just felt like ranting, and I thought it was entertaining enough to post.
Jason Hicks

11. Jan, 2010

I can definitely hop on the anti-circumcision band wagon having had it done to me at birth. I think the vast majority of circumcisions are for cultural reasons — the other reasons are definitely used by those in denial though after its done to them.
Hugh7

11. Jan, 2010

Great rant but you left out “A boy should look like his father”. My answer, http://www.circumstitions.com/Images/looklike.gif

If a father still thinks that, let him restore his own foreskin – and how about hair removal and penile reduction surgery to make the resemblance complete? That argument is all about the father’s anxieties, not the son’s. A son’s reaction when he learns why they’re different is more likely to be “Poor daddy!”

There’s another answer on “It looks better/Women prefer it”: times change and tastes change, and nobody knows what people will think looks better or women (or men) will prefer 20 years from now. With circumcision now down to about 55% in the US, whole willies (if you’re British, dicks if you’re not) are going to be a lot less unfamiliar 20 years down the track. Not only that, but he might move somewhere circumcision is not the norm, or simply grow up to wish he had all he was born with. How DARE anyone try to second-guess him on anything so intimate, based on THEIR preference?
Spoony

26. Feb, 2010

I really like your rant! I’m glad that you clarified that it was, and I agree, those are really horrible reasons, and that the ‘religion’ one is the best! At least it isn’t supposed to be ‘rational’!

I’m planning to do a dry, logical, and witty and tasteful and rational and scientific argument on my website, as well as expand on it with my own experiences in this culture, which are quite… baffling. You would find them amusing, I’m sure. Here’s a sampling:

First off, when I was a teenager I didn’t know that penises had foreskins, because they were missing from my anatomy books and stuff.

My first realization that anything was missing was when I was about 20 and this guy told me he was circumcised and I wondered what that meant, and then he told me all this stuff that I later found wasn’t true, thanks to the library. That’s how I got into this whole thing.

Later on, I interviewed this guy who was talking about being circumcised as a teenager and how badly it had affected his sex life (it was a rather extensive one) and how he was depressed for two years.

I used all this in discussing this with other people who have just brought it up out of the blue. I was prepared, but my arguments never reached them.

I’ve had an “It’s okay, we’re all different” religious woman getting her son circumcised in my backyard, practically, because of her conversion (not his!) I’ve had a crazy pregnant girl scream at me for saying anything “It’s MY CHILD!” and stormed out of the room, I’ve also had these two girls who had never met one another start talking about it and tell me that it’s a good idea to circumcise infants because then they don’t know what they’re missing when they’re older, and that it would be okay if their clitorises had been chopped off at birth for the same reasons. You know, because they wouldn’t know to be upset about it — and they both thought that despite never having met before!

Judging from the responses I get from people on issues on this and a myriad other things, I have come to the conclusion that most people are lazy idiots. That’s why I’m building a website to help make people’s brains better, so that I won’t be quite as lonely, as long as I can persuade people to get into it.

Oh, and I came across your rant because I’m actually going to write an ENGLISH PAPER on this subject. Can I pull it off? Only time will tell…. Hoo hooo hoooooooo!
Ali

20. Jun, 2010

You are aware that uncut penises build up filth that cut penises don’t?

You know, cause there’s no where for it to build up. Look just cause your parents didn’t get you circumcised when you were a kid doesn’t mean you need to write this dumbass rant to justify your obscene and most likely filthy dick.

Also how the hell does religion not justify getting circumcision done? If someone wants their kid cleaned up what the fuck is it to you?

Obvious uncut fag is obvious, get out of here with your stupid argument. You clearly don’t know anything about pleasuring a woman so why even try arguing over it.
Jonathan

20. Jul, 2010

good ranting about not being circumsised and i agree that infants shudnt even be cut at birth. When they get older they can make that choice when they know what they want to do. I mean come on its not fair to people who parents choose to get cut. Luckily i wasnt those who got cut at birth.n In my teenage years i went through low self esteem about my penis being uncut. I was the only one in my family that wasnt cut. Why ? i would never know. But when i turned around 15 i decided i wanted to get ct ut. I had sex without being cut and then when i got cut. the sex is no diffrent. Main thing was it was my choice to get circumsised . Doctors should persuade parents to wait till they children are old enough to decide what they want to do
angry reader

21. Jul, 2010

i am insulted by this article and i have an incessantly inflammatory comment about it :V

Likes to Ramble

Five Horrible Arguments for Circumcision

11 Responses to “Five Horrible Arguments for Circumcision”

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