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Tim Hortons: Get Your Shit Together

Tim Hortons: Get Your Shit Together

The images for this article have been since lost from the sever. The article is originally about the poor design of the Tim Hortons lids. They have however since fixed this issue, and Tim Hortons remains pleasing the world with its delightful coffee… God I’m addicted. The article will however remain on the website due to Tim Hortons clearly reading this article, and then switching their lids.

Here is the article summed into an image:

HOLY SHIT TIM HORTONS YOU DID IT

HOLY SHIT TIM HORTONS YOU DID IT


I know Tim Hortons is the fast-food sludge of the coffee industry, but that doesn’t stop me from going there several times a week for my injection of cookies, doughnuts, and double-doubles. Real coffee shops tend to give you an experience, I’ve found; I go there to sit down with my computer for a good few hours, slowly ordering food and drinks so I don’t get kicked for loitering. They’re actually like restaurants, while Timmy’s is a slightly-less-rich McDonalds (only without the disturbing brainwash-marketing that makes children inexplicably love them).

Sometimes you just want a coffee and a doughnut, and that’s what Tim Hortons is for. So it stands to reason that they need to have their own variation on the fast-food fountain drink. This is the Tim Hortons cardboard cup with a plastic lid:

 

(That’s the winter design; the rest of the year it’s just a shit brown colour.)

It’s actually a pretty good design — sometimes. It may be hard to tell from that picture if you’ve never been to Tim Hortons, but the rippled part of the plastic lid can be folded up to make a little hole for drinking. On paper it seems like a really neat idea, just giving the cups a means to open and close while still making them pollute-o-riffic. But there’s this one thing that annoys me: it only works when it feels like it.

The ideal use of the plastic lid goes thus:

 

But then half the time, step 2 is unfortunately followed by step 3:

 

This is not acceptable. Why the hell does the plastic lid not stay open sometimes? Can’t you hire some elite engineers to fix this? Hell, my dad is an engineer; just hire him! (Note: I do not know if my dad is qualified enough to design a small bit of plastic. I’m not responsible for any damage if you actually hire him.)

The solutions to this problem are many. A lot of people I know just drink with the plastic tab sticking up, like a barbarian. Some minority of people actually bend the tab to get inside the cup, thus presumably making the entire drink taste like brown plastic. Neither of these are acceptable solutions. This is like providing your website with multiple stylesheets so you can support shitty browsers. This is like covering the seat with toilet paper before you sit down. THIS IS NOT A SOLUTION.

 

No one I’ve ever pointed this out to has ever cared. Am I just insane?

Written by Likes to Ramble

9 Comments

  1. Mark Wright sudbury · March 2, 2014

    Tuck the tab in.
    It’s called a splash guard.
    It’s what all the pro’s do.

  2. Dan Soucy · January 3, 2012

    bought a hot chocolate at a tim horton’s today. reporting that the plastic tab refused to stick to the lid; it kept trying to jam itself into my face until i cut it off.

  3. Ryan Lalonde · November 21, 2011

    I’d like to point out that McCafe by far has the best lids for their coffee cups. They’re easy to use they’re the easiest lids to drink from.

  4. Bran Rainey · June 26, 2011

    Tim Hortons seems to have fixed this problem permanently recently. I never have a problem with their cups anymore.

  5. Ryan · January 5, 2011

    I’d just like to say I’m a tim horton’s professional and go at least once a day.

    I can always get my lid to stay up.

    If it doesn’t stay te first time pull it so it tears up just a little further (don’t pull to hard and rip it to sh*t). Now when you push it in it will stay.

    You’re welcome.

  6. Meagan · December 4, 2010

    Can you add a section to this about how they always line up the lid and cup so that the hole you drink out of is RIGHT ON THE SEAM LINE OF THE CUP. It’s so annoying. I always have to spin the lid away from the seam. And it doesn’t make sense because there is like 99.5% chance (I’m estimating) of the hole being anywhere else on the cup other than the seam line. I’m just sayin…

  7. Ryan Lalonde · November 21, 2010

    I love that you made an article about this. 3 out of 4 cups that I get from Tim Hortons have this problem and it’s seriously annoying. Why can’t the lid just stay open and click in place?!

  8. Jason Hicks · November 20, 2010

    Wow, I’ve been thinking this for years. We really need to get the message out to everyone including Dixie. Of course you’d have to rip the tab off completely for your coffee drinking experience, but why do we have to risk cutting ourselves every time we want some coffee?!

  9. Tweets that mention Tim Hortons: Get Your Shit Together | Likes to Ramble -- Topsy.com · November 19, 2010

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Bran Rainey, Likes to Ramble. Likes to Ramble said: New post: Tim Hortons: Get Your Shit Together http://bit.ly/b167PR #ltr […]

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